The Chef-d’oeuvre

People usually fall in love, I didn’t, I woke up in love, I did,
Call me a moron, but I didn’t fall for you, fell for another ‘her’,
Fell deep into the sucking void of her glam and beauty, idiocy it was, blind sight,
Never saw that lady shadowing ‘her’, never knew that your shadow was my light,
She was shady, not dark, she was silent, her inner fire beautifully violent, splashing,
her confidence showed her might, her soul was a pretty sight, so was her art,
Her dangling bangles I never noticed before, lost in her tattoo I was,
My thoughts often started with atoms traveling through space-jumping  into blackholes,
But it was the past, thoughts did a full circle always jumping over your cheeky black mole,
Only the width of your heart made me stop in my tracks, butterfly farm it was,
Waking up to you after falling for the wrong person, I fell again, but you caught me,
Threw me to the sky, floating up there, like your spirit, free, radiant and ever warm,
The question of ‘The One’ never popped up, call it intuition, call it a sixth sense,
My sixth sensual she was, she often used to paint me, paint me with herself and love,
I could never make out those colours, it was a dizzy world of comfort, high on emotions,
Skipping her degrees for an alternate career she made me skip beats, swooning,
Her paintings I never understood, I understand now, standing over you,
Standing over your grave, I wake up again, wake up to see you in your canvas,
5 decades later I realized, I never fell for her, she did, I was her masterpiece.
~Brushed

The Forgetful Hypocrisy

For the past 40+ hours, my Facebook newsfeed been hit by overtly emotional posts from everyone expressing their love, their inspirations from the eminent leader that passed away. I appreciate the humanity people show towards other people who they have not seen or met. It moves me to see people getting emotional only by influence. I saw people crying out loud. I saw people praying to god that it was a false information. I heard people cursing the gods. Without any doubt, that leader was a great person. Or were they?
Exactly a year back, weren’t we all actually outraging over the internet? There was this mass artificial natural disaster that had ripped apart Tamil Nadu and dismantled the civilization into Nothingdom. I distinctly remember seeing posts and sharing memes(Guiltily) which told that the successive election would definitely be a change in TN political scenario.

After moving on from the floods, or rather diving into forgetville, we were met with a scenario which we could’ve used to change our Government and a part of our lives a bit. The social networks raged and raved about how it is our responsibility to alter the usual politics in Tamil Nadu.

But the 53% poll attendance proved otherwise.

We conveniently forgot the what happened in the previous years, hell we didn’t remember what happened only 5 months prior to the election. The whole of Tamil Nadu was shocked by the number of people who turned up to vote. All those memes, posts, rallies, Awareness Videos and campaigns went down the drain, so did our dignity.  The little sliver of hope that was the results, were also brutal. All these keyboard kshatrians were just existing out here.

I vividly remember being delighted people thrashing all the politicians for their irresponsible silence during major events in the state. I was surprised that with this force of energy from people, TN was going to change.

But no.

We lost ourselves to the emotional Atchayar evoked in us by the Media. We completely forgot what had actually happened and we forgot to look into detail or try to find/know the backroom manipulation behind all this. If only our parents could feel a percentage of emotion for their children they felt for people they barely met in life or if the children could respect their parents as much as they respect the leaders whom they don’t know much about, our Country would be elsewhere. Where did we muster so much emotion from? what happens to this emotion during important events? I seriously don’t get it.

Maybe Forgetting is a national trait. Hypocrisy is a now human nature.

By now you must think I’m a disrespectful person who doesn’t honor the dead. But I do, I really do. I respect that Position as much as the person who came out of all the difficulties of life. It’s just that I try to care the alive more.

May be if you ever think a little bit, even a miniscule amount that I’m right, you might try to change yourself.

-The Guilty

Perfect Recipe for a South Indian Climax scene.

We south Indians are known for our great and unimaginable fight sequences. We freaking love Drama!

We’ve cooked up the perfect recipe for the best climax fight sequence.

Ingredients

  • Lots of knifes and wooden logs, 1 gun, that isn’t used.
  • 1 empty, windy open land with red soil or straw. It must be dusty and things must fly.
  • 6 Small Sized thugs for warning the hero. Loud ones with dark, sweaty looks appreciated.
  • 10 Medium sized thugs, interval scene fights.
  • 4 Large thugs, climax fight.
  • 1 comedy thug who knows pseudo karate (Size doesn’t matter)
  • 1 major villain, choose your own villainy type. (Loud, Fat, Suave, ruthless,etc.)
  • 2 sub villain – left and right hands.
  • 1 hero & 1 superhot heroine
  • 1 bike for Hero, no helmet (Shot miss aayidum)
  • 21 Scorpio cars – Fast and dusty and 1 Omni car – For kednaping purposes
  • 1 azhuku chloroform kerchief and Rope – as per requirement

Preparation

We need to motivate our hero to level up from a common man to a super human-punching-kung-fu-panda man. Nothing beats emotional motivation, our motivation is kednaping the hero’s family.

We use an omni to take away the hero’s sister from a signal and his family when they’re shopping simultaneously. The hero will chase the omni cars to the villain’s place on a bike.

Now that they motivation has been initiated we can get into the method.

Method

We use the “Fresh” Formula of Villain being defeated as method. The camera Jooms in and out of the villain standing in middle with of the dusty field. The thugs standing in descending height order from left to middle and ascending height order from middle to right.

Hero has to come flying, sitting over a jeep bonnet, in army dress. (We don’t copy, okay). Audience might wonder how he arrives in a Jeep while he was pursuing them in a bike. That is the twist.

*We won’t tell you. Poda*

With a superhero landing he will dole out very loud punches. The sub-villains signal like a traffic cop to the thugs to go in geometric progression (2 > 4 > 8, I know, maths la weak, pardon me). The hero gives up as they threaten his family. As he falls on the muddy land, Heroine’s voice is heard.

Serving

As the drenched heroine (Imagine slow-mo hair swishing) calls out to hero who wakes up with unnaturally red eyes. As the BGM plays in background he fights with a spear saves everyone. He will serve them justice.

Post-fight he will introduce the girl whose father he just beat up. When the family hugs, the villain will shout and point a gun at them. We see the trigger pull and hear a shot.

Police enter and shoot the villain. Movie should end with a duet.

Measurements

This is the important part of the recipe. We must totally disregard physics laws, More the thugs bounce, better the scene would be. Also, when the wooden weapons will explode when they touch him.

Beating one thug with another, he punches all their faces at once, in one single punch.

As raindrops stylishly roll over his face without impairing his vision, one of the sub villains “poke” him with a knife which doesn’t kill him. Of course he beats them up.  

Then come the 4 big thugs. All of them fall down with one punch. No, he literally shouldn’t touch other 3. He doesn’t kill the main villain, because he is the Villain-in-law.

Side notes

Add comedy and glamour to taste.

Served FDFS